If you’re worried about your child’s development, learning, behaviour or emotional wellbeing, an assessment can feel like an important step towards understanding what is going on and getting the right support.
For many families across Ireland, however, that concern is followed by one of the most frustrating things a parent can hear: that the waiting list may be measured in years rather than months.
You may be waiting for an Assessment of Need, a psychology appointment, an educational assessment, occupational therapy, speech and language therapy, or an Autism/ASD Assessment. During that time, it is natural to feel worried and anxious, especially when there are so many unknowns. You may find yourself wondering whether your child will speak, how much support they will need, whether you are doing the right things and how other people will respond.
Many parents describe feeling caught in between: concerned enough to seek help, but still without the answers, reassurance or support they need.
The good news is that you do not have to do nothing while you wait. There are practical and meaningful steps you can take now to support your child and make the waiting period feel a little less uncertain.
Trust Your Observations
Parents often worry about whether their concerns are “serious enough” to warrant an assessment.
It is important to remember that you do not need to wait until difficulties become severe before seeking support.
You know your child better than anyone. If you have concerns about their development, learning, emotional wellbeing, communication, behaviour, attention, or daily functioning, those concerns are worth exploring.
Even if an assessment later identifies no significant difficulties, seeking guidance early is rarely a mistake.
Document Everything
One of the most helpful things you can do while waiting is to begin documenting your observations. Keep a detailed diary of your child’s behaviours, challenges, and strengths.
Note examples of sensory sensitivities, social interactions, communication patterns, and any routines or repetitive behaviours. Consider keeping notes about:
- Behavioural concerns
- Emotional regulation difficulties
- School-related challenges
- Communication difficulties
- Sensory sensitivities
- Sleep difficulties
- Attention and concentration concerns
- Social interactions and friendships
This record will be valuable whenever the assessment does happen, whether publicly or privately.
Patterns often emerge over time, and written observations can help professionals build a clearer understanding of your child’s needs.
Talk to Your Child’s School
Schools can implement many supportive strategies without a formal diagnosis. Request a meeting with the Special Educational Needs Co-ordinator (SENCO) and ask what reasonable adjustments can be put in place now.
If concerns are affecting learning, behaviour, social relationships, or emotional wellbeing, consider speaking with:
- Class teachers
- Special Education Teachers (SET)
- School principals
- Guidance counsellors (where applicable)
Teachers may notice patterns that differ from what you observe at home.
Likewise, sharing your concerns can help schools provide appropriate support and accommodations while you wait for further assessment.
Focus on Strengths as Well as Challenges
When parents are worried, it is natural to focus on difficulties.
However, it is equally important to recognise your child’s strengths, interests, talents, and successes.
Children benefit when they experience opportunities to feel competent and confident.
Encouraging activities they enjoy can support self-esteem, emotional wellbeing, and resilience while other concerns are being explored.
Support Emotional Wellbeing
Waiting for answers can be difficult for children as well as parents.
Some children become aware that they are struggling and may compare themselves negatively to peers.
Simple strategies can help support emotional wellbeing:
- Maintain predictable routines where possible
- Create opportunities for connection and play
- Encourage open conversations about feelings
- Validate frustrations without dismissing them
- Celebrate effort rather than perfection
- Focus on strengths and achievements
Children do not need a diagnosis to benefit from understanding, patience, and support.
Be Careful About Information Online
The internet can be a valuable source of information, but it can also be overwhelming.
Many parents find themselves reading social media posts, forums, or articles that seem to perfectly describe their child.
While online resources can provide useful information, they cannot replace professional assessment.
Try to view online content as a source of education rather than diagnosis.
Every child is unique, and similar behaviours can arise for many different reasons.
Look After Yourself Too
Supporting a child through uncertainty can be emotionally exhausting.
Parents often carry significant worry, guilt, frustration, and pressure while waiting for answers.
Looking after your own wellbeing is not selfish—it is essential.
Consider:
- Talking to supportive family members or friends
- Connecting with parent support groups
- Taking regular breaks where possible
- Seeking professional support if needed
- Acknowledging that you are doing the best you can with the information available
Children benefit when their caregivers feel supported too.
Understand That Support Does Not Always Require a Diagnosis
One of the most common misconceptions is that children cannot receive support until they have a diagnosis.
In reality, support should be guided by needs rather than labels.
Schools, healthcare professionals, therapists, and families can often implement helpful strategies long before any formal diagnosis is made.
Early support can make a meaningful difference. Just remember you are not alone and that your fears do not necessarily reflect your child’s future, but your love and actions do.
Consider a Private Assessment
Many families choose to remain on public waiting lists while also exploring private options. For families who cannot afford to wait, a private assessment offers a timely, thorough, and clinically rigorous alternative.
Depending on the concern, support may be available through psychology, occupational therapy, speech and language therapy, psychiatry, educational assessment, or psychotherapy services.
Before pursuing private assessment, it is always worth discussing options with your GP or other healthcare professionals involved in your child’s care.
Remember: You Are Already Taking the First Step
Parents often feel powerless while waiting.
However, seeking support, asking questions, gathering information, and advocating for your child are all important actions.
You do not need all the answers today.
The fact that you are paying attention, seeking guidance, and supporting your child through the process already matters more than you may realise.
A Final Word
Waiting for an assessment can feel uncertain, but it does not mean you have to stand still.
Focus on understanding your child, supporting their wellbeing, working collaboratively with schools and professionals, and recognising their strengths alongside any challenges.
Most importantly, remember that every child develops differently, and a diagnosis does not define who they are.
Your child is far more than any assessment outcome.
About BetterCare
BetterCare supports children, adolescents, adults, and families across Ireland through psychology, psychiatry, occupational therapy, speech and language therapy, psychotherapy, and specialist assessments.
If you would like to discuss concerns about your child or explore assessment options, our team is available to help guide you towards the most appropriate pathway.
Book a free consultation, call us on 01 556 3335 or 089 230 0366, or contact us through our website.
References
Health Service Executive (HSE). Assessment of Need under the Disability Act 2005.
National Council for Special Education (NCSE). Supporting Children with Additional Needs in Schools.
AsIAm (2025). Parent Resources and Supports.
ADHD Ireland. Information and Supports for Families.
Dyslexia Association of Ireland. Guidance for Parents and Educators.
Children and Young People’s Services Committees (CYPSC). Supporting Child and Family Wellbeing.
World Health Organization (WHO). Child and Adolescent Mental Health.
